Cora's story
Cora died in my arms suddenly and unexpectedly while breastfeeding December 6. She was only five days old and was born November 30 just a few days before her December 4 due date. One moment I looked down and saw her peaceful face growing sleepy from breastmilk. A matter of seconds later, and I looked down to a limp, pale baby, face covered in blood, with no movement. I screamed, jumped up and realized she wasn't breathing. We're still learning what happened to sweet baby Cora, but the preliminary report says that Cora was born with a congenital heart disease or condition. We await the final report to find out what condition. My pregnancy, labor and delivery were healthy. I had great prenatal care. Cora's Apgars were both 9s, and my hospital was top notch. Cora displayed no signs of a bad heart. Cora transformed my life. She wasn't a planned baby. I'll never forget taking a pregnancy test on Easter morning 2009 and realizing my life was changed forever. My husband and I quit smoking, struggled to provide financially, and totally changed around our lives. For more information, follow me on Twitter @kristinebrite I'm working on a Web site to tell Cora's story and will be posting that URL.
*** I typed this out on my Blackberry in an email to a friend a few days after Cora's death. I can't bring myself to read it again. I haven't read it since. Can't bring myself to edit my frantic storytelling. I hope that it's not full of grammar mistakes. I hope it tells you her full story and how she lives through her life saving and life altering work.
My husband and I rushed her to the hospital, driving her ourselves.
Nothing could be done to save sweet Cora. She died in my arms, but was pronounced dead after the doctors heroically tried to revive her for over an hour.
After Cora was born, I was transformed even more. I've never felt such joy, happiness, patience, and compassion. That love is the only thing getting me through. Cora has touched so many even though she met few. She teaches us all compassion, patience, and to cherish every day.
Through Cora, I've learned more about congenital heart diseases or CHDs and focus on sharing her story to raise awareness of CHDs, which is the number one birth defect.
I'll continue to work to spread Cora's story forever. Please help me spread the compassion Cora brought into my life and also raise awareness of CHD.
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81 people showed love and support:
Darling, I cannot imagine... You have my love and tears and hope for peace for your family at this incredibly horrible time. Cora was absolutely beautiful and has touched so many people in such a short time. Know that she is not forgotten...
I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. I know that those words cannot come close to bringing you comfort, nor can they express how horrifying what has happened to you and your family really is, but know that I am so sorry. I hope and pray that you will find peace, and know that Cora will be remembered.
Found your blog through 1in100. My wife and I lost our first child to CHD at 23 days old. It was the hardest thing we've ever been through. If there is anything we can do, if you'd like to talk, please feel free to contact me matthewpkenned(at)gmail.com
You are doing great Kristine. Don't forget there are many Heart families here to help you when you need it. Stay strong, but know that it is OK to be weak. Be loud in spreading awareness for CHD, but know that it is OK to curl up and hide. Be patience and understanding, but know that it is OK to pitch a fit and get mad.
You are an amazing Heart Mom and I look forward to working with you to raise awareness of Congenital Heart Defects.
I am so sorry. I will pray for you and your family.
I am so sorry for your loss of your gorgeous Cora.
I too know that words cannot come close to bringing you comfort, nor can they express the depth of tragedy that has happened to you and your family.
Sending you strength and love at this difficult time.
CHD robs many families of their precious newborns before they even know of it.
oh, look how ridiculously cute she is, kristine!
i'm so sorry. i've followed your tweets and prayed for you often since hearing about cora. thank you for your raising awareness, as well as reminding us all to cherish each moment even more.
I am so sorry to hear of your loss. My little girl is also a CHD baby and had an operation at 3 months'. Take care of yourself.
you have my prayers <3
i'm so sorry to hear of your loss. found you through @herbadmother and hope you find peace and healing in time. my grandfather died of hypertrophic cardiomyopathy at the age of 60... and i thought that was young. you're in my thoughts.
oh my heart goes out to you. unbearable loss. please know we are here for you and sending out prayers and support. give yourself every opportunity to heal in any way that helps you. so very sorry.
Thanks for everyone's support and thoughts. So nice to hear how Cora has touched people.
My daughter was born with a congenital heart defect and Down syndrome. She came into my life when she was fifteen months old and her adoption was final a few months later. I am so sorry for your loss. I also lost a child, through a failed adoption, and while the pain is different, you are not alone....and Cora will live on through the amazing work you are doing educating the masses about CHD. My heart and thoughts are with you.
I am sorry for your loss. Praying for you and your family.
I am so heartbroken for you. I am so sorry you've lost Cora. She is absolutely beautiful.
Wish I could hug you for real.
I am so sorry for your loss. I have my very own angel also. I carried to term my son who suffered from a fatal condition you are so right, special children like our angels teach so many so much in such a short amount of time. I was blessed with 35 weeks in the womb and 3 hrs and 45 min in my arms. Vayden also died in my arms and if you have to go then that's the best way to go, in the loving arms of your mother.
god bless you and I will be posting your story on my FB and waiting for your web url to post on my website.
Levi let me know about your sweet Cora. She is beautiful. You are all in my thoughts and prayers.
From One Heart Mommy to Another, I will never stop fighting for our babies.
~Mary
I, too, have an angel named Cora. She was stillborn May 2, 2006. I'm sorry that you had to go through something so unbelievably traumatic.
Thoughts and prayers to you!
~Brittanie~
http://corarei.blogspot.com/
I am so sorry for your loss.. I found a link to your site on facebook from Vayden's mommy.. I lost my daughter in May.. there is nothing like living day to day in a world where my daughter is not.. praying for you and your husband and family.. so heart wrenching.. your daughter is beautiful..
I am so very sorry that your beautiful Cora has had to leave you so soon. Only the mother of an angel can know the pain that you're going through right now, and I hope that, although this is not a club that any of us want to be in, we can bring some slight comfort for you to know that you aren't alone. Many women have travelled the path before you and before me. Seek their wisdom to survive.
Thinking of you
x
I am so terribly sorry that Cora left so soon.
Wishing you peace.
xxx
Hello,
I came over from Bir's blog to send some love and my deepest condolences. I lost my daughter, Ella on March 15th at almost 24 weeks into my pregnancy. Cora is such a beautiful name. I am so sorry. Hugs.
Bree
I am so so sorry. :(
To all the other Momma's who lost their babies and all of the other heart Mommy's. I feel for you as well. We've all gone through the worst pain imaginable. I hope to connect with all of you soon. I'm so overwhelmed by all of the love and support I'm getting.
So sorry for your loss of Cora. That is such a beautiful photo of her.
xx
I, too, lost my daughter in my arms. She was 28 days old, and born with Leukemia. I don't know why these beautiful babies are taken, but please know you are not alone. There is a huge community here to offer an ear, and support at this incredibly difficult time. Cora was beautiful. I am so sorry.
I'm so sorry about Cora.. what a beautiful name. There is a lot of support here...
Hello Kristine,
My name is Lauren and I'm 22yrs. old. I was born with a Congenital Heart Defect (or Congenital Heart Disease is just another name for it, not difference). My CHD is called Tricuspid Atresia or Hypoplastic Right Heart Syndrome. I wasn't diagnosised till I was 11weeks old and in severe heart failure and dying. I'm very lucky to be here, but reading stories like yours totally breaks my heart! My prayers are with you! Cora was adorable! I can't imagine the pain your going through, my parents only got a glimpse. May God comfort and guide you through this difficult time!
Stories like yours make me mad too, mad at doctors for not giving all newborns an echocardiogram (Echo for short) which is the only for sure way of detecting all CHDs! I'm trying so hard to be the voice for CHD for those who don't have one like your precious Cora.
CHDs is the NUMBER ONE birth defect and I don't understand why it's so under reseached and publized.
Please know I have you in my thoughts and prayers and that you Sweet Cora has already inspired SO many and her legecy will live on! People will learn from Cora and she will never be forgotten! Cora is a beautiful angel looking down on you!
You have a online community that loves and supports you! God Bless!
Sending LOTS of **Heart Hugs** your way!
With LOTS of Hope, Love, and Faith,
Lauren (22yr. old CHD Survivior)
Blog: www.laurensheart.blogspot.com
I am sooooo sorry for your loss! As I was reading I really felt my limbs go numb- like I was suddenly in slow motion- looking at that sweet angel in the picture and thinking she is no longer on this earth- breaks my heart!!! I am thinking of you!
I lost a son six years ago. It was a cord accident that took his life though. Please know that you are in my prayers!
Hugs-
Laura
(momentsofpause.blogspot.com)
I'm so sorry. Words cannot describe the pain of losing your baby. Cora is so beautiful and I love her name. I lost my Carleigh in March. She had a fatal defect and was born still. I miss her so much. She is such a blessing to me. (((hugs)))
I'm so sorry to learn of the loss of your beautiful Cora. I read about you on Birni's blog and wanted to let you know there are sadly many of us out here in blogland who've had recent losses and I've found such support and comfort through the rough days from these other babylost mothers. Wanted to share with you that we were gifted with a beautiful picture storybook that has really helped our older children deal with the death of our fifth child, their baby brother George, who died during my labour May 19, 2009 (likely cause of death was cord compression). The worst agony after losing George for me was my milk coming in - have a post about how to help deal with that on my blog on the left sidebar - Sage tea is a natural way to reduce milk. Sending you love and deepest sympathy for your family's tragic loss.
hugs hun
I am so sorry for the loss of your beautiful daughter Cora. I lost my twin daughter and son last year and it was the hardest thing I have ever been through. Sending you wishes for peace.
I am so sorry for your loss, what a gorgeous girl and name you gave your daughter. I hope and wish and pray for a circle of arms and light around you and your family right now. And sweetness and peace. This is horrible. But I am surviving, I lost my daughter June 9, 2009, my third sweet baby, now an angel. I miss her.
I am sooo sorry for your loss.
I am so sorry for your loss. There are no words that can take away your pain. I am a mom of a two year old that has undergone multiple open heart surgeries. Each time she goes in the O.R a piece of me fades away...
We are all here for you. I am sending good thoughts your way. Cora- what a beautiful baby!
I am so sorry for your loss. I read your post and my eyes filled with tears. I cannot imagine the sorrow you must feel. She was a beautiful baby! Hugs to you and your family!
I'm so sorry for the loss of your beautiful baby. What a shock for that to happen. Something no mother should have to go through. Blessings....
I'm so sorry for your loss. Cora's beautiful!
I cannot imagine. Praying for you and your family everyday. Cora is so beautiful and what a strong mother she has.
God Bless from Deltona,Florida
I am so sorry for your loss. So very sorry. I am stopping over from SITS this morning. How hard this must be for you. God bless you and your family at Christmas.
I have caught up on your story this morning, and have been thinking about you all day. How truly horrific. I am so, so sorry.
I wish you peace this Christmas and hope you find some comfort, somehow...
Kristine, my heart is broken for you. I learned about your beautiful baby from another heart mom who is my friend...and my heart aches for you, your husband, and beautiful little Cora.
There are many of us searching for a cure for our babies, and I think you are a hero for thinking about helping others during this time. Know that you still need to take care of you, and find a balance. Cora would want and need for you to do this.
heart hugs to you and your angel
Thinking of you. I can't believe your loss was so recent, you seem to deal with it so well. Wishing you continuous strength...
Love,
Dagmar
Dagmar's momsense
http://DagmarBleasdale.com
Oh my goodness... I cannot even begin to imagine... I am soooooo desperately sorry!
I don't know what to say. It's absolutely unimaginable.
My prayers are on their way.
I cannot imagine. I am so so sorry for your loss.
Her photo is so precious. She was a beautiful baby! Beautiful. I'm so, so sorry for your loss :(
I am so so sorry for your loss. Prayers and love
So sorry to hear about your daughter. My daughter is also a cardiac baby and we did not know that till she was 2 days old. Hospitals really need to check out every baby either an echo or pulse oximetry tests. Prayers to you and your family
I am so sorry to learn of your loss. My heart truly goes out to you right now.
We didn't learn about our son's complex heart defects until he was two weeks old. It is scary to think of how seriously wrong things could've gone because his defects were missed.
Things really need to change because things like this should not happen. No baby should be sent home with heart defects.
I applaud you for using your loss to make changes happen.
Stef, Ryan, Wyatt and Logan Jacks
www.whenlifehandsyouabrokenheart.blogspot.com
When you're ready, I suggest reading the book The Lost Daughter by Daralyse Lyons. It's a novel, but it will help. When you're ready...
Thank you everyone for the comments. I read everyone. I don't always have the energy to respond. Thank you for reaching out.
OH.MY.GOSH. I am SO deeply sorry. SO SORRY!!! I wish with all my heart and soul we weren't on this dreary road together. Thank you for reaching out on my blog. I know there IS NO CONSOLATION, but I still need to tell you that I believe with all my heart and soul that our babies were just too perfect for this fallen world. . . I also believe with all my heart that we'll have them in our arms again. Forever and ever and ever ever ever.
Love,
Natalie
Natalie, We truly do travel this awful path hand in hand. At Cora's funeral, I told everyone she was just too beautiful to be here. The same is true for your precious babe. They were just too out of this world.
Thank you so much for sharing this. My husband suffers from a CHD called Tetralogy of Fallot which means he was born with four heart defects. We are expecting a baby in September and will be sure to have it screened. I really, really appreciate the information you're sharing.
First of all Congrats! Farrah, Your husband is an adult fighter then. I've met many, so brave and strong. I'm guessing because of your husband's CHD you should also have a level ii ultrasound done. Let me know if you want any other resources.
I'm so sorry for your loss, and so very proud of you for turning a negative into such a positive element in your lives.
((HUGS))
Jade.
so sorry for your loss... sending you and your family all the way from the other side of the world from turkiye...
She is beautiful. I am so very very sorry for your loss. Cora's beautiful angel soul is helping you on this journey in raising awareness. You and your husband are in our families prayers.
What a beautiful daughter you have in Cora. Your story has touched me deeply. My son was not born with CHD but a lung disease with a poor prognosis. He's done very well, beyond are wildest dreams. He started kindergarten this year. But through our experience we met a woman whose doctor identified CHD during her ultrasound and advised she terminate her pregnancy. When she returned still pregnant for her next visit, he didn't feel they were a good patient/doctor match. She began seeing the OB I had during my pregnancy and too gave birth to a beautiful little girl. While their sweet girl was also with them a short time, she'll always been remembered and kept close at heart. Your sweet Cora reminded me that their sweet girl became an angel a year ago. No matter how short their time was together, nothing changes that they became a family because of her as you have because of Cora.
I am so, so sorry to learn of your story - Cora was beautiful... I cannot even begin to imagine your pain. I lost a child to miscarriage, but that cannot even begin to compare to the hurt and trauma you have gone through. And what I find so amazing, is how you are shedding light on CHD and working to save OTHER babies' lives when you have just lost your own. You are amazing. A hero! God bless.
I am so very, very sorry to read about your loss. Thank you for all you are doing to spread CHD awareness. I'm the mom to two CHD children, the most recent being a month old. They both have TAPVR, and I count my blessings every day to still have them. I am so so sorry again.
I'm sure that there isn't much I could say that hasn't already been said. But I wanted to let you know that I was here. That I read Cora's story, that my heart is breaking for her.
I have twin daughters who were born prematurely and who both had this issue (it is called a PDA and it is common in preemies & something that they test for). I had NO idea that they didn't check for this in ALL babies. That is outragous. My girls needed medication to correct this issue (many need surgery, we got lucky).
Our hearts go out to u guys i had the similar thing gr8 pregnancy not an easy labour 36hrs was hard but we did it in the end i was takin to the ward after i had mia (my daughter) very happy and thought we wud b home the nxt day =( following mornin thy cudnt get a pulse readin so she had to b rushin up to intensive care were she remained for 3 wks and no 1 nw wat was rong with her thy lets us go after all tht time and had an emergancy call frm the doc to bring her bk mia was home for 6 days thn booked bk in the hospital for another 2wks basically diein, we had a call from a specialist at a top hospital a couple of wks later were thy new wat was rong with her in the matter of seconds she was operated on the nxt day and recovered very wel she has had another op since thn and we pary there wi b no more it is very scary and i didnt think things like this were real but thy r and my heart goes out to u WELL DONE 4 wat u have done and keep up the good wrk: check out mias website if u wud like 2 its,
Mialeightonjones.co.uk
take care hunni
all the best ove claire & mia xxx
I'm so sorry to hear about your daughter she is so stinkin cute. Yes I can agree with u the dr.'s should do the test about CHD so this don't happen.
I have tweeted you before, but Cora is forever yours, no matter what, she us now in your heart & on your shoulder watching you, guiding you, cheering you on!! Keep up the Fight for Cora, & other lil ones like her, who might not otherwise have had thf chance..you & Cora..will go far!! She is your brightest star!! Love her with all your might mama, she's your daughter, feel angry, sad, mad, glad, proud, everything you want & need to feel..is ok.. we love you, we love Cora-my great grammy's name btw!!
I am so sorry for your loss. I could not imagine what you have been through. My son was born with PDA, a CHD that almost went undiagnosed until i left a bad pediatrician for a good one. We were immediately went for heart tests and monitored closely until his heart was fixed at 13 months. I know how close i was to losing him and know how lucky i am to have him every single moment. you will be in my prayers! your strength is beyond imaginable and I admire how you have turned a horrible tragedy into something to help others. Cora will alwyas be a part of you and a part of the hearts of all who knew her!
Tessa
My heart is breaking as I am writing this. I could never imagine going through what you have gone through. My daughter is 12 weeks and I couldn't imagine the pain you are going through. I am so sorry for your loss. Cora will always be a memory to me, even though I never met her.
So incredibly saddened to hear of your unimaginable loss, yet inspired by the wonderful tribute to her life in helping save other babies. You are amazing, just like Cora!
I just need to tell you how very sorry I am for what you've gone through and continue to go through. I came here through Natalie's blog. How are you doing? Are you getting through this thorny path okay? Ever since the death of our little grandson my heart hurts so very much more for those of you sweet mothers who find themselves traveling this road. My prayers are with you.
An Angel with the Book of Life wrote down your sweet baby girl's birthday and whispered as she closed the book, "Too Beautiful for Earth".
Stumbled upon this blog and am so moved by Cora's story. Thank you for sharing it. You and your family are in my prayers.
Oh...that is so sad.
I feel so bad for your baby. I wish I got to meet her, and I could feed her warm milk everyday like you did. I feel so sad for Cora.
-Grace Claire (call me Glare)
I am so sorry to hear of your loss - how sad...very moved by Coras story. My baby boy, Thomas www.babythomas.co.uk was born still on New yrs day 2004, 8 months into my pregnancy. He also had a congenital heart defect. x
My foster son died from a heart defect, while his had been caused by alcohol fetal syndrome we prayed he would be ok, but like your little girl it wasnt to be he died unexpectly and my heart broke. We also lost our own daughter in 2008 to a condition called Rett syndrome. I can not tell you it gets easier but time helps you to learn how to cope with it.
Keep doing what you are doing bringing awarness to others about hearts defects you are very brave.
My daughters website is www.livvyssmile.co.uk
feel free to email me if you ever want to talk xx
After reading this, I have to go into my daughter's room and tell my 1 year old I love her dearly. Bless your heart. She is so precious and those few days you held her in your arms will forever fill your heart. Congrats on quitting smoking btw. When my sister lost my 2 month old niece, I saw how hard it was to go through such a loss. Lots of hugs.
clc_little_britches@yahoo(dot)com
Just found your blog. And, first, I am truly sorry your sweet baby Cora died. Truly. Second, thank you for blogging and telling your story. You are a blessing.
Rachel
Kristine,
What a beautiful tribute to your dear Cora this blog is. And what an amazing life she is still living through you and what you are doing with her memory. Upon reading your blog the thought crossed through my mind, "I don't think I'll ever visit this blog again." It is almost too heartbreaking to look at, think of, and imagine. My next thought is, "Kristine lives with this pain (and so much more than I can even fathom) every day." I agree fully with what Natalie said: "I believe with all my heart and soul that our babies were just too perfect for this fallen world. . . I also believe with all my heart that we'll have them in our arms again. Forever and ever and ever ever ever." I know that there is a reason for all that God does. There are SO MANY times I ask "WHY?" And I will never fully understand until I am with him again. For you, I cannot answer why, but I do believe that you are one of God's noble and brave ones. Just reading about the changes you and your husband made when you learned that Cora was coming makes me know you were great parents and still are wonderful parents striving to keep her memory alive in the service you do in spreading the word. Cora was too good for this world--she was one of his noble chosen ones too. You will be so rewarded in time to come when you will be reunited with Cora and God. While I will probably never meet you in this life, I hope that perhaps one day I can meet you in heaven. Perhaps our little girls can be friends.
Thank you for all you do.
So immensely sorry for your loss.
The tragic irony of the name you chose for Cora strikes me- "cor" means heart in Latin.
You are so brave to share your story. You did everything you could for Cora while she lived, and you are undoubtedly helping other babies now.
Best wishes, Sarah
I want to tell you how touched I am by your story. Cora was due the same day as my son Roland, and was born the day before he was. You're a remarkably strong and brave woman, and I feel honored to have been given the opportunity to read about Cora's life. May God continue to wrap his arms around you each and every day. I pray that every time the sun peeks from behind the clouds, you feel her warmth and love.
I will not forget your story sweet baby Cora. How incredibly proud you must be that your mommy and daddy are helping to save the lives of other babies.
Donna Tate
I send all the love and prayers toward you and your family. My son was born w a CHD and I feel fortunate that it was detected immediately after he was born. I know that feeling of finding out something is very wrong w your child when you had a normal pregnancy and had no other indication of any issue. It's horrifying, but to loose that child is so much worse.
Be strong. Cora's story will serve as a powerful tool to help new moms protect their babies.
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